Tuesday, March 30, 2010

I'm TIRED, Quincy

Go with what you know, teachers used to prompt me on multiple choice tests as a child. Don’t get caught up on the questions you don’t understand.

This is the theory I used when filling out my brackets for both Fug and March Madness this year. (
Fug Madness, obviously, being a MM-style contest based on the year’s worst fashion faux-pas as worn by celebrities.) I spent an entire lunch hour scouring the archives of GoFugYourself.com, noting Katy Perry’s affinity for plastic-fruit-adorned dresses:

and Rihanna’s 2010 Empowered Dominatrix Tour:

If there is something that I feel confident in filling out, it’s a celebrity fashion bracket.

Then, as an afterthought, I gamely filled out my March Madness pool in four minutes –not focusing on the match-ups I didn’t know- and handed my $5 to a colleague.

I followed the hell out of Fug Madness, scoring my bracket and bemoaning Momsen’s loss to Courtney Love much like Jayhawks fans after the UNI game. I even considered deleting my cookies so that I could vote again when it looked like Mischa would fall prematurely.

I didn’t pay much attention to the real tournament, except to notice that my brothers were still sporting their Blue Devils gear with pride this week and and responding to unrelated questions with a booming “DUKEEEEEEEY!” while alternately punching me in the shoulder or fist-pumping extremely close to my face.

Needless to say, I was pretty shocked when I found out that I had only 5 left when we made it to the Sweet 16 of Fug Madness last week. (Does no one else think that a 15-year-old who dresses exclusively in garters is WRONG?) My Fug Madness standing was almost as shocking as when I discovered that I was in second place in my March Madness pool. Nevermind that this year’s tournament was ridiculous, so winning the pool pretty much means you picked like an idiot. I’m now heavily invested in the games this weekend, as a Duke win would clinch a first-place finish for me.

I’m still pretty heartbroken that my inaugural Fug Madness bracket won’t go down as legendary- though I applaud my competitors, Joel and Tal, who are apparently rocking it. However, I think a $75 prize would allow me to get over it pretty quickly. Plus I’d have bragging rights for my personal bracket strategy, which I detailed here last year. So- GO DUKE! Even though I picked you solely based on my mother’s bizarre love for Coach K, I’d really appreciate your cooperation in helping me buy the
cardigan I just spotted at J. Crew this weekend.