Four strong hands on the steering wheel

Road Trip Pop Quiz

Not everyone can be the nicest girl in the world, as Joel and I quickly learned on our road trip. Enjoy this pop quiz, which will give you a little taste of what driving from Vegas to Mpls in two days will do to two relatively sane and kind people. We managed to have a pretty sweet time, and impressed Joel's dad who was legitimately shocked that we were still friends after twenty six hours in a car together.

1. Who said the following: "I have yet to see someone who is NOT overweight in this state." (Bonus points if you guess the state)

2. Who did an "awwwww" after spotting an old man in a yarmulke in a car driving past in Nebraska?

3. Who admired a "sleek" car passing by, only to see that it was a Buick?

4. Who brought up Cindy McCain's breasts in a political conversation with Joel's relatives in Colorado?

5. Who first demanded that the Dixie Chicks' "Long Way Around" be played?

6. Who was more likely to scream things like "regulation, you jackass!" and "Shut your pie hole, Old Man River!" while listening to a very static-y debate on the radio?

7. Who first sang the "ding ding ding" theme song from Deliverance when seeing some pretty special looking towns on the drive?

8. Who first brought up the idea of the passenger being allowed to have a few cocktails to spice up the drive?

9. Who demanded a full listen-through of the Mamma Mia soundtrack at 9 p.m. on day two?

10. Who would declare "the hunter has become the hunted...." in a sinister voice every time we'd end up behind a car that had previously been tailing us?

11. Who displayed more road rage in their 5 hours of driving than the other driver did in their 20+ hours of driving?

12. Who spent the entire road trip trying to figure out how to sarcastically bring back the phrase "GOD FORBID!"

13. Who started screaming "COP! Oh god slow down!" to the driver and then started cackling at their funny joke a few seconds later, as the driver nearly started to cry?

14. Who, despite all odds, did not become a James Taylor fan after being forced to listen to his greatest hits?

15. Who kissed up to Joel's relatives by talking Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young- only to find out that David Crosby is their "family friend" who had recently sat in their same chair at the breakfast table?

16. Who was told within three hours of the trip that they did not have an apartment waiting for them in Minneapolis anymore- despite having sent a rental company a security deposit the previous week?

17. Who, after hearing the opening bars of "Joyful, Joyful" asked angrily "Why does Lauryn Hill have to be such a crazy bitch and not release more music?!" only to be told that Lauryn Hill is in fact bipolar?

18. Who made fun of a slightly W.T./unattractive couple walking into Chili's- only to see the boyfriend kiss his girlfriend's hand and gaze at her adoringly, thus making the judger feel like a first class jackass?

19. Whose main role on the road trip was to clean the thousands of bugs off the windshield at every gas station?

20. Who referred to the attendant at the Green River, CO gas station as a "glandularly challenged giant"?