Golden Globes - live text or something

One thing you may not know about me, if you don't know me IRL, is that I'm one of those awful twenty-something women who know more about celebrity culture than they do about... well, probably anything.

I don't have time to read shamelessly flawed internet tabloid sites anymore, but I do still love a good awards show. Pretty people, in pretty dresses, alternately smiling or smoldering at the camera depending on their current publicist's advice? I'm all over it.

Luckily, so is Joel. When the Golden Globes were on this past Sunday, we casually began texting our red carpet opinions. 3+ hours and nearly FOUR HUNDRED text messages later, Gervais concluded and our epic text session ended. Which is when I told him that I was planning to edit out the F-words and post some of our better banter to this blog.

If you don't like swearing or people who spend their lives judging others, then I'd come back next week.

Let's do this.

Sometimes we just say what probably everyone in the planet was thinking at that time (Justin Bieber):

Often, we say what only we are thinking at the same time:

(Helen Mirren):

(Sandra Bullock):

Sometimes I'm reminded that Joel is 1,000 times funnier than me (Tilda Swinton):

(Lea Michele, then Alicia Keys):

Sometimes all is right with the world (Joseph Gordon Levitt, Natalie Portman):

Sometimes we're off-topic but can keep up with one another (Milla Jovovich, Michael C. Hall):

My favorite moment of the night was when we began scripting our own movie based on the actor onstage (Clare Danes):

We're probably going to find a way to live-blog the Oscars. I haven't told him that yet, but I think it could be epic.