Showing posts with label August blogging challenge. Show all posts
Showing posts with label August blogging challenge. Show all posts

Friday, September 2, 2011

Zorbing

Let's celebrate Friday and the end of this challenge by listening to the first track of the Stornoway album Beachcomber's Windowsill. This song is called Zorbing and I personally enjoy trying to sing the very low backup chants, which I'm sure you'd find unbelievably attractive.



Because Joel refuses to blog despite being the funniest person I know, here are the (verbatim) musings he shared with me after watching this video for the first time:
  1. Through centuries of inbreeding, British people now only have like 15 faces they could be born with.
  2. List of resemblances of their faces: Simon Pegg, Jamie Oliver, Alan Cumming
  3. The drummer is hot sans that douche fedora
  4. The ukelele dude (simon pegg) looked like a drunk mumbling along with the song.
  5. You think you have a small mouth? Did you see the lead singer?
That's a wrap. Thanks, ProntoPup and friends!

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Your girl is lovely, Hubbel

SPOILER ALERT: This post contains plot spoilers of the 1973 film The Way We Were, starring Barbra Streisand and Robert Redford. If you have been meaning to see this movie for the past 38 years, but have not, please do not continue reading any further.

In the end scene of The Way We Were, Babs (Katie Morosky) and Bobby (Hubbel Gardiner) spot one another across the street, years after they divorced. The theme music swells as they approach and embrace one another, while Hubbel's new wife stands at his side watching the scene unfold. An awkward conversation ensues, leading to an even more awkward goodbye where Katie invites them over for a drink. A few moments later, he crosses the street to talk to her again.

This whole scene is awesome – first, she mentions that she is a better loser than he, having had more practice. And then after a brief silence she says, “Your girl is lovely, Hubbel.”

This is such a bitingly perfect compliment. The blonde charmer is a girl, an object that accompanies Hubbel but is too afraid to speak up even when he is reunited with his greatest love. She is also everything Katie could never be – exceedingly beautiful and content to live non-controversially as the wife of a Hollywood screenwriter. Meanwhile, Katie is still standing on the side of a New York street corner screaming at passersby to sign a petition, showing that her fiery passion hasn’t diminished at all. The disparity in their goals and personalities worked for a brief time, but it never could have lasted; though he was at his best when constantly challenged by Katie, Hubbel was not strong enough to sustain the counter-culture lifestyle. Somehow, this scene acts as evidence that their decision to split was the right one, while simultaneously showcasing the regret and “what if” that Katie and Hubbel will always feel.

This ending, in case you can’t tell, slays me. First, I am more Katie than I am blonde charmer. Second, I’ve dated more Hubbels than I have political activists. And third, I am excellent at projecting. So any time I catch this scene, I can be found sniffling and moaning at the injustice of it all. As LH would say, you should see this movie if you want to. Even though now I’ve given away the ending.




__



A note to scriptwriters, producers, directors and other Hollywood movers and shakers: Should anyone ever bring up the possibility of remaking The Way We Were starring, say, Jessica Biel and Ryan Reynolds, I will personally quit my day job and protest, Katie Morosky style, outside your shoot everyday until you are forced to shut down production. There are some things that should remain untouched.

Xenophobe

xen·o·phobe

[zen-uh-fohb]
noun
a person who fears or hates foreigners, strange customs, etc.

Can you please use it in a sentence? Surely!

In the past, America celebrated the melding of cultures and was even fondly known as the melting pot; as such, it would be shameful if our nation elected a xenophobe as president of the United States of America in 2012.


Webinar

Me: "So I was taking this webinar this morning and..."

Roommate: "I'm sorry, you were taking a WHAT?"

Me: "A webinar? Like an online seminar?"

Roommate: "You've got to be kidding me. Seriously. I am so not cut out for corporate life. That makes me want to die, Gina."

After considering Roommate taking a webinar, we cracked up. Roommate is not the type of gal to sit in a cube, or even at a desk near a window. She's meant to be on the go at all times, and that's one reason she'll be unstoppable in her chosen career path, nursing. There are many other reasons, too - she is smart, patient and kind but tough when she needs to be.

Roommate starts nursing school in just six days, and I'm so proud of her for shunning the cubicle/webinar lifestyle in favor of something that suits her better.

Personally, I kind of like webinars, provided they're interesting and not too sales-oriented. In fact, I was bummed when I had to miss one I'd signed up for today.


You're better than this, too, John Cleese.

Villains

Earlier this week, my roommate and I called the police after witnessing what looked like two villains breaking the law.

First, we heard the sound of glass breaking. We looked up, but pretty much ignored it. Then, we heard more glass break and we rushed to our window to see what was going on in the street below. Across the street, a man was kicking in a door and breaking the glass window of the door. This seemed… strange. But not as strange as when another guy came out, also bashed the window in, then ran back into the building and tried to jump out his first floor (not ground floor, so it was about 7 feet up) window. Not able to break through on his first try, this second man straddled the window while working to bust it open and jump free. Once landing, he ran away.

As you can imagine, many expletives were being shouted the whole time. Glass covered the sidewalk and while it was dark, Roommate and I assumed there was a lot of blood, as well. We live on one of the busiest streets in Minneapolis, so clueless pedestrians were walking past the scene only seconds later, completely unaware that if they turned to their left, some crazy dude covered in blood might be running down the alley toward them.

This is why, even though the action had subsided, Roommate and I decided to call the police. I called 911, quickly informed the operator that it was not an emergency call, then described the incident in full detail, giving descriptive details of the two men we’d seen. (Actually, Roommate described them to me, and then I relayed them to the operator, because it became apparent during this crime watch that I am in need of glasses.)

Within five minutes, the men had returned to the scene, at the exact same time as a single cop car drove down the street. The window jumper taunted the cop, who must have called for backup and after quite a scuffle, the two men were apprehended. Then, being the Law and Order junkies that we are, we wondered if we should go to “give a statement.” I know. We’re losers. But there had been only one cop car dispatched to the scene, and now there were no fewer than eight cop cars outside our window, so it seemed like things had escalated to the point where perhaps we could clarify what had started the whole thing.

And so we went down there, flagged down a cop, and gave our report. I still don’t know if this was helpful, or necessary, but I suppose more info is always better in cases like this. Plus, we all know that in cop movies, they interview the people across the street with a good vantage point, so why not just jump the gun there, eh? We were thanked for our call and statement, and informed that we had been witnessing the tail end of a domestic dispute. While this was significantly less exciting than what we originally assumed had happened, I was still very glad that we took the initiative to call. It was apparent by the way they were taken into custody that help was needed, even if to just remove them from the situation and get everyone calmed down. Moreover, despite living in a busy hub of the city, I do consider my neighborhood safe and I’d like to keep it that way. Last, as Eric reminded me, I defied the bystander effect that everyone learns about in Psych 101 by calling in even though I wasn’t sure if it was necessary to do so.

Villains? Perhaps not. Still, something wacky happened and I’m glad that by being proactive, we helped to return the peace and minimize damage and injury.


(Source)

Monday, August 29, 2011

Taylor Swift

The thing about Taylor Swift is that I unabashedly love her. I went through a phase last winter where I thought she might be obnoxious, but then spring came, and I decided I didn't care what she was like because her music makes me really happy.

My friend Emily thinks this obsession is extremely entertaining because aside from my love for T-Swizzle, I tend to be a music bitch. I know I love Taylor Swift because she is everything I am not.

Taylor is blonde, tall and extremely lean; I'm brunette, of average height, and, in the words of another blonde pop goddess, my hips don't lie.

When Taylor is wronged by a dude, she publicly vilifies them for years through her songs; I once wrote a blog post detailing how proud I was of a breakup that was full of mutual respect and admiration.

Further, Taylor is committed to the idea of living a fairytale even though her interchangeable Prince Charmings seem to not be as committed as the Disney princes of yore. On the one hand, you want to shake her and say, "Listen sweetie, if you really can't see that John Mayer is going to use and abuse, then you need some serious counseling." On the other, you want to say, "Mad props on the multiple tabloid covers that publicly dogged him, and also the hit single."

The other thing I love about Taylor Swift is that despite her lyrics being annoyingly superficial, and not even making sense, I find myself belting them out. The best example:

Today was a fairytale - I wore a dress, you wore a dark grey t-shirt.
You told me I was pretty when I looked like a mess - today was a fairytale.


Girlfriend, what kind of dress were you wearing that it paled in comparison to Prince Charming's grey t-shirt? Did you sew it from a sheet or something? Did you fall into a mud pit while you were dancing and kissing in the rain? I mean, give some context. Or don't, I'll sing it anyway.


This will not end well. (Source)

Sing out


I've had this version of this song on repeat the entire summer. Every time I listen to it, I find a new meaning. So far, I've convinced myself that it's about a religious conversion, a recovering addict fighting to stay sober, and a parent trying to teach their child about beauty and resilience in the face of devastation and loss. So you know, it's pretty upbeat.

Random roommates

When I entered college seven years ago, I was paired to live in a dorm room with Annie, a girl I'd never met before. We talked on the phone once that summer, and I found out she was a soccer player from Duluth, MN. She later told me than (due to an error on my application), the roommate match letter said I was from Minneapolis instead of the suburb in which my parents actually resided.

"I was terrified to call you," she said meekly, a few days after we'd moved in and became fast pals. "I though you were going to be really ghetto and inner city - I thought you were a thug. Then I called you and you seemed bubbly and mentioned dance team, and I was super confused."

If Annie and I were matched today, she could have easily Facebooked me and found that I was neither ghetto nor thug. In fact, I was a lot like Annie - headstrong, easily excitable and 100% addicted to Dr. Pepper.

Instead, we had to navigate through the first few weeks of school rather awkwardly. After a few beers at a party, I got teary over the boy I was missing, and she walked me home early and talked me through it until 3 AM. When I found out that she (4'11" and no more than 90 lbs) was planning to walk home from her job at 11 p.m. three nights a week, I began walking there with another member of our floor to pick her up and escort her home.

We annoyed one another, I'm sure - the boy I was crying over soon became a regular weekend guest, and she had a love for Disney soundtracks that I could never quite get behind. Still, living with Annie was a fabulous experience. I found a partner in procrastination, late night studying and sleeping past alarms. We talked politics, religion, and other adult topics that I'd never once thought about only months before. Despite taking divergent paths the last few years of school, we still remain friendly and in sporadic contact.

As this article in the New York Times mentions, the "random roommate" match has largely become obselete, thanks to Facebook and other online tools that allow students to find roommates with similar backgrounds and interests. An NYU professor writes, "I am sad that most of my students will not experience what I did back when Mark Zuckerberg was in diapers. While the Internet has made it easy to reconnect with the lost [acquaintances] of our lives, it has made it a lot more difficult to meet them in the first place, by taking a lot of randomness out of life. We tend to value order and control over randomness, but when we lose randomness, we also lose serendipity."

This loss of serendipity is true, I think, and also so sad. I learned more in college outside the classroom than I did within it, from being placed in awkward situations that challenged who I thought I was and who I wanted to be. The bubble I'd always known and lived within was stretched and punctured, and I was left questioning, rather than accepting, what I'd been told was true.

Perhaps most importantly, the guy who walked with me to pick up Annie each Monday, Tuesday and Thursday was Joel. At first I was proud that the most popular guy on the floor wanted to walk with me - then, over the course of those few months, over 10:30 p.m. chai tea lattes at Espresso Royale, we became inseparable confidantes. Because of those walks, we shared Joel's first walk during a snowfall, detouring for several additional blocks so he could properly catch and melt snowflakes on his tongue. We crafted a plan for him to come out to his dad. We locked ourselves in his room to watch movies the night our whole floor went out together before spring break. We laughed each time he arrived, pillow in hand, to sleep on our floor after his roommate had brought home yet another girl.

You can see, without my random roommate, I'd have missed out on so many important life experiences. So I'm pretty bummed that the incoming freshman of the future will arrive not only to gleaming new dorms with bathrooms in each unit, but also to a fresh-faced roommate who looks and acts just like them. Where's the fun in that?

Quit

I'm not going to quit this blogging challenge, even though I'm approximately ten days behind. Much like ProntoPup, I'm probably just going to blitz the internets with ten posts in the next three days and then be done with it.

This poster gives good inspiration:


Did you know this poster also led to many amusing recreations like these?









and eventually the fun-haters tried to put a stop to it with this vicious recreation:

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Om Nashi Me

If, for some reason, I was dropped into the middle of a dense jungle with only a machete to hack my way out, and an iPod programmed with only one song to play on repeat for motivation, I would choose this song. And I would succeed with the task in record time.

It is also great for driving on highways.

Monday, August 22, 2011

Napoleon Dynamite

This movie came out around my freshman year of college and despite a constant onslaught of reenactment among my peers, and the general acceptance that it was "THE BEST MOVIE EVER", I never saw it.

From the clips I saw and the nasally, disaffected "Tina! Come get your ham!"-s that rang through my dorm at all hours, I just had a feeling that this movie was not for me. Also, as a fan of Tina Majorino's early work (Andre is a cinematic masterpiece*), I was highly disturbed to see my childhood girlcrush looking so brutal.


I quickly learned not to tell people I hadn't seen the movie, because they'd look at me like I was growing antlers, or accuse me of "hating fun". I politely laughed when a guy I was mildly interested in spent 15 minutes reenacting the scene where Kip scopes out hot chicks online, but I stopped texting him back.

Anyway, I never saw more than a few clips of Napoleon Dynamite. Then it came on in my hotel this weekend as I was packing, and I decided to leave it on for a bit. After about 20 minutes, I came to a shocking realization. I knew almost every line. The parts about feeding Tina, the Glamour shots lie, getting three feet of air off the bike jump, Rex Kwon Do, Napoleon needing Deb to get her product out of his locker to make room for his nun chucks. I had been exposed to the material so many times that not one scene held a shred of originality in my eyes. I don't even know how that's possible, but it's true.

My other conclusion, which was less shocking, was that I hated this movie even more than I thought I would. To be fair, I'd passively been hating it for seven years, so it really didn't stand a chance. Still, I forced myself to turn it off before I got retroactively rageful at the kids on my dorm floor who (when they weren't KY-Jelly wrestling one another in the common room) had apparently ingrained each line deeply into the recesses of my mind. Bastards.

N is for Napoleon Dynamite - if you tell me in the comments to give it another chance, I'm likely to take you out with my bo staff.

___

*While reflecting on Tina Majorino in Andre, I suddenly realized that her dad in the film is none other than the actor who played special agent Frank Lundy on Dexter. Is your head exploding right now, too?

Friday, August 19, 2011

Mature

My boss and I are extremely mature human beings. That's why, after our web team launched our new website this week, we celebrated by heading down to our photo studio to take part in the latest photo craze, horsemanning:


Bizarre photo trends are all the rage right now - it began with planking:



and has moved onto owling:



and patching:


and now, we're at horsemanning. After much discussion, my boss and I decided that owling and patching are inferior to planking and horsemanning. Simply crouching in a corner or covering an eye is not at all embarrassing, and therefore not worthy of accolades or internet fame.

There are a lot of haters on these trends - some are claiming they're dangerous (heh?), while the pop culture obsessed (read: hipsters) are already declaring them "so yesterday."

Me? Just as I was a sucker for flash mobs, I'm a sucker for dumb photo memes. In a world where everyone's a bit Too Cool For School, I find it refreshing to see so many people dedicated to making fools of themselves in public. What do you think?

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Lewis, Jenny

As a kid, it didn't get bigger than a weekly trip to The Movie Store (seriously, that was the name of the movie store. We hadn't quite hit Blockbuster status yet). Each Friday night, my older brother and I would accompany my dad to The Movie Store, which was followed by a trip to the drugstore in the same strip mall, for candy.

One of our favorite joint movies was "The Wizard," which stars Fred Savage, Luke Edwards and an utterly brilliant (depending on your definition) Jenny Lewis. The quick plot: Luke is a young boy placed in an institution after the death of his twin sister. His brother, Fred Savage, helps to break him out of said institution and they go on the run to California - "California" being the only word Luke has uttered since his sister's death. Meanwhile, their loving father (Beau Bridges!) comes looking for them, as does an evil runaway child bounty hunter.

On the road, they met up with Jenny Lewis, a badass runaway who quickly realizes that Luke is a Nintendo prodigy. In an effort to convince their parents that Luke should not be institutionalized, Luke and Fred agree to enter him in a Nintendo competition that happens to be located in California (A foolproof plan if I've ever heard one.). The trio spends the rest of the movie dodging the bounty hunter and other unsavory characters, as they hustle their way across the country to the competition. Without spoiling the ending, it's worth noting that the game being played in the final round of the competition is... the newly released (at the time) SUPER MARIO BROTHERS 3. As you can see, The Wizard is a timeless classic, provided you were born between the years 1983 and 1987.


I must have watched The Wizard fifty times in my childhood, along with Jenny Lewis' other big films, Troop Beverly Hills and Big Girls Don't Cry. Girly girl that I was, I loved that Jenny always played a hardened tomboy with negligent parents.

Imagine my surprise when I found out in 2005 that Jenny Lewis was the lead singer of one of my favorite bands, Rilo Kiley! I pretty much lost it.

Here's my favorite scene from The Wizard:


And here's my favorite Jenny Lewis song, though I'm not sure what the backstory on the video is:


I think she made the right call on joining the music scene, and on keeping her childhood bangs intact.

Jenny Lewis, thank you for 20 years of entertainment. You're a goddess.

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Key takeaways

*Written on Monday AM*

What's up, party people?! I'm coming off a late night event, and I'm running largely on coffee (shocking) and 45 minutes of sleep (for real, I better not get stuck next to a chatter on my plane).

Last night was chaos, but also a lot of fun. Pretty much every possible thing went wrong, but I bobbed, weaved, and deferred to a guy with much more knowledge than me, in order to get through. Overall, attendance was high, revenue was high, and the attendees looked like they were having the time of their lives. So despite some of the very real problems that arose, I'm excited to take on next week's event, which I'll be running solo.

Post-event, we talked a lot about "key takeaways." Without getting too detailed, my events are run in big box stores across the country. While I'd like to say that my key takeaway was how to master a pallet jack to move product in the back storeroom, the truth is that I sweet talked lots of dudes into moving stuff for me yesterday.

At 2 AM, I coaxed my main man Carlos into moving three final pallets to the loading dock.

"Man! I see you've already mastered the art of flirting with the back room guys," my co-producer laughed.

In truth, I was at a keen disadvantage - during our initial conversation, it became apparent that Carlos would rather discuss the relationship statuses of the attractive male members of my team. Huzzah! No eyelash batting was necessary, and I got in a good gossip session on the freight elevator with my new BFF. Also, I taught Carlos the Z-snap.

There were other key takeaways that were less exciting, but will prove more beneficial as I enter Event Markets 2, 3, and 4. I'll be reviewing those in the next few days, and then diving in headfirst on Saturday. Wish me luck!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

John Thune

Today, while discussing the Iowa straw polls with a co-worker, I mentioned how shocked I (still) am that John Thune is not running as a Republican candidate for president. For those of you who've never heard of him, Thune is a South Dakota Senator who beat out Tom Daschle for his seat in 2004. He's 50, a former college athlete, an evangelical, and he's authored some doozy gun rights bills. He's only been married once, and his name isn't associated with any sex acts. Also, he looks like this:


When he's trying out his sexy librarian look, he looks like this:


I truly don't understand how it's possible that this man isn't running. Has he really just been sitting in South Dakota, watching his neighbors Bachmann and Pawlenty dance the crazy tango?

I know next to nothing about the strategy of entering and exiting the presidential race. Perhaps it's too late for a guy who's more substance than flash to enter this cycle's ideologically driven Republican primary. However, I just have a feeling that Thune, or someone like him, is being prepped by the Republican establishment to come in and take the race over once the nutters exhaust themselves.

No, I didn't wake up a Republican this morning and no, I'd never vote for this guy. I just think it would be a victory for the whole country if we had two educated candidates bringing conscientious discourse back into presidential politics. Can you imagine if we had two policy wonks going at it in the debates, instead of incendiary, talking-point obsessed bobbleheads? The heads of the Fox News blondies, and Al Sharpton, would explode. Soundbites might have to be a whole 45-seconds due to the nuances being discussed. Perhaps most importantly, people would realize that politics is actually kind of a dry topic, after you take out gay marriage and abortion. The mainstream media would lose advertising dollars due to low interest and... as a result, election night could be free of Will.I.Am holograms.

On the other hand, my liberal-minded amigos remind me that the current field is good news for our bedraggled Obama. And there are few things I want more in life than to see what a lame duck Obama could accomplish. So perhaps I should count my blessings that Crazy Eyes is leading the pack right now. I just don't think it speaks very highly of our country.

Politicos with knowledge of campaign entry strategy - am I way off-base? Is it too late for someone with a lower profile to enter the race? If not, is there someone else you think is going to pop in? Most importantly, who's going to buy me a cookie if I somehow end up being right about this?

Friday, August 12, 2011

Ignorant tight-ass club

I didn't watch the Republican debate last night - partially because I don't have cable, and partially because I try to avoid activities which cause me to pull my hair out (I have so little to begin with).

I did catch some soundbites, which was a terrible idea. While I imagine much of the night was spent one-upping one another to determine the rightiest of the right, I also know that if a quote makes the 60-second clip wrap-up of a two-hour debate, it's probably pretty damn inflammatory.

So rather than spending my night wondering how my beloved Minnesota could produce two Republican presidential candidates who are equally incompetent in different ways, I watched my favorite clip from The West Wing.

(If I were on the communications team for the Obama reelection committee, I'd commit this clip to memory. You're going to need some serious vitriol to combat these fools.)

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Hipsters

I live in an area populated with a lot of hipsters. Many times, I’ve been confused as to whether the person walking by is a hipster or a 20-something dressed as my 5th grade geography teacher. Last week, I saw a woman in a baggy black cotton turtleneck, black mom jeans (tapered, high-waisted, and ill-fitting all over), caramel colored orthopedic shoes, and an across-the-shoulder bag with cat embroidery. She was, of course, wearing glasses that looked like this:


Much like the fake rastafarians that ruled my high school in the early ‘00s, I think hipsters spend a lot of money to look like they don't have any money. This frustrates me, as I'm the girl who tries to make Target clothing look fancy.

To be fair, not all hipsters look like your grade school librarian - some are super cute, and might lead you to say things like, "Could I ever rock teal high-waisted denim pants?" The answer to that question should almost always be no.

Don't discount hipsters trends all together, though. For example, my roommate just purchased these shorts from Anthropologie:


She got them hemmed so they, in her words, looked "a little less Troop 172 leader and a little more 1940's pin-up." She looks fabulous in them - huzzah! Long live high-waisted bottoms that are somehow flattering!

Where was I? This is a very disjointed post. Let's return back to the golden rules of fashion. Coco Chanel once said, “Before you leave the house, look in the mirror and remove one accessory.”

I think hipsters and budding hipsters might need a similar guideline. How about:

"Before leaving the house, remove clothing items and/or facial hair patterns until your appearance is less than 30% ironic in nature."

If ironic math isn't your bag, follow this rule: If the golden couple ^ of hipster fashion would not wear what you're wearing, take it off.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Freelance

Over the last year, I’ve freelanced for three local marketing and advertising agencies. I love freelancing because it usually fosters a symbiotic relationship – I get great experience for my resume, a natural opportunity to network with other people in my field, and a little financial padding. The agency who hires me gets short-term, relatively cheap labor from someone they trust. The recession has caused my industry to reevaluate the need for full-time employees, which is a major source of anxiety for my marketing amigos. One upside of the downsizing is that freelancing opportunities are (at least in my experience) relatively easy to come by.

My third project this year is coming to a head, and I’ll be traveling the next four weekends to produce events in some pretty baller cities. My easy-going nature is a benefit in many event situations – I am an expert at rolling with the punches. However, the events I’m producing this month are very structured, and may require me to push back if things don’t go as planned.

Much like Beyonce has created Sasha Fierce as her onstage persona, I’ve decided the best way to approach these events is to create a badass event alter ego.

So far, I’ve come up with Badd Roxy. I think it needs some work, to be honest. Any suggestions? Please leave them in the comments. Having a perfect name is really the first step to rocking these events, I think.



The third picture is my go-to dance move, actually. Unfortunately, it is usually performed in yoga pants and a t-shirt instead of a mesh, House of Dereon two-piece ensemble.

Oh! And here’s a list of freelancing tips I published a few months ago.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Devil's advocate

I don't remember where I heard it, but someone (probably Jon Stewart) once said, "If you say you're playing devil's advocate, you're really just saying you're going to play an asshole." I think this is hilarious, and almost always true.

Earlier this week, I sent Eric this segment from the Today Show. It discusses a new phenomena where young women go on "Sugar Daddy" websites to find older, wealthy gentleman who will help pay off their loans or otherwise compensate them in exchange for (ahem) companionship. The women, called Sugar Babies, were touted as yet another byproduct of the crippling recession.

I was surprised by the segment - surprised that one of the women profiled was a Sarah Lawrence grad, that there were hundreds of thousands of women signed up, that the women weren't considering their faux-mances to be prostitution.

I said to Eric, Sarah Lawrence birthed the feminist movement! How is this even possible?!

Eric said he agreed, but he was going to play devil's advocate. Boo. He wondered, Could the women have different values than you? Perhaps they can justify and even become empowered by their role, rather than allowing it to defeat them?

No! I cried. Being a sexual object is never empowering. Empowerment is all about engaging in your chosen behavior with no strings attached. Saying that women might gain empowerment by sleeping with older men is no different than saying that women shouldn't feel denigrated if their bosses hit on them.

That's when Eric told me I was coming at this issue from a white, middle class, Judeo-Christian perspective. That's the problem with feminism - it assumes we all have the same values, backgrounds, and goals.

I've had this argument about a hundred times - hell, I majored in this argument. However, it doesn't ever get any easier. Also, the longer you're away from Emily Dickinson essays and classrooms full of women advocating for transgender bathrooms in preschools, the harder it gets to fight the good fight. Even when you're just fighting with someone on your side, playingdevil's advocate.

So, in the beginning there was basic modern feminism, which stated that women had the right to control their bodies. And now, we've added an asterisk, where we remind women that selling their bodies in exchange for a lifestyle upgrade is simply a new way to relinquish that control. In ten years (in ten days, probably), there will be another way in which sexuality is being used as a commodity, and I'll fight that, too.

Whew. After we finished discussing the horror that was the Sugar Babies, we somehow segued to planning a Rick Moranis marathon. That was a much more fun topic, to tell the truth. But this was an important one.